And Hermes Said…

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And Hermes said
Go fuck yourself
Go fuck yourself in the rain
At a busy intersection
In a place you do not know
With a constantly malfunctioning GPS
On a day when you have 15 tightly scheduled appointments.

And Peitho replied:
I accept your judgement,
My love,
If that is your judgement.

And Hermes said:
This isn’t what I hired you for;
This isn’t why I married you.
I married you because of a tongue
That was just a hair softer
Just a spec faster than mine.
I married you
So that you could stop me
From my maniacal cackling
And persuade me of reason.

Peitho replied:
You have spoken well,
Best Beloved,
And therefore, do as you suggest
And love me for all of this,
Rather than curse me,
And do listen to reason
According to what you have spoken
And back down from your immodest demands
For, as I have said,
Your priest has a house to tidy
And children to look after
Your priestess is looking for a job
And I intuit your grandiose plan
Though you’ve said nothing
And I can assure you:
Zeus does not need a shrine
On a commercial space-shuttle
Nor will Athena suffer much
If no one constructs her a suit of armor
Entirely out of bacon
Now set down your staff
And lie with me amid the herds
And look up at the stars

And Hermes said:
I’m sorry
About the thing I said
With the GPS.


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